If I wasn’t in school five days a week, I’d probably be hibernating this winter. As it is, I can’t say I mind the weather so much. I’ve managed to get those little rubber boots on Doe’s feet, which has eliminated a lot of the anxiety I felt last year; She started having seizures that I was sure had to do with the salt and ice – mostly the salt. Anyway, this winter she’s scrambling around like a champ in those little red boots and, so far, no seizures.
I leave her every afternoon to go to class. I don’t have any classes before two. That gives me time to write in the mornings, and take her for a walk before I leave. The writing I’ve been doing has been mostly homework but today I dropped math, which should free up about ten hours a week. I don’t know what I was thinking to sign up for that class first semester. I was never any good at math and now I’m rusty on top of it. Also, it brought up memories of my father that were painful. Yesterday, I was in tears about it. I can’t remember the last time I was in tears for any reason, let alone math!
I’m writing a lot, of course, which I love to do. My brain works in that realm. How can you be smart in one thing and so completely out of your depths in another? It’s interesting to have assigned reading too. I’m so used to choosing what I want to read, but part of going back to school is letting go of this idea that I know better. It’s always been something of a handicap, I think – that arrogance. Math should be all the reminder I need that I’m not as smart as I think.
I’ve been trying to get Three A.M. Analog off the ground, too, which means finding the musician/writers to begin. A lot is already in place but, without the stories, it’s just an idea: A literary press for musicians who write fiction and creative non-fiction. I think it’s a pretty good idea. Turns out there are quite a number of us out there. I’m looking forward to working with other writers on their work. It’s one of my favorite things to do.