What Are You Doing Now?

Maybe it’s Facebook. My desire to write has been compromised by the constant request, “What are you doing now?” And what am I doing now? Usually, not what I should be doing. Usually, I’m telling myself I’ve got the whole week ahead of me to get some writing done. Not that that’s what I say on Facebook. No. On Facebook, like everyone else, I write a one liner that says something, but not too much. It’s harder than it looks and I don’t do it so well. I have “friends”, who are really good at it. Their one-liners are witty and suggest the whole story. I like Facebook, but it’s one more thing I shouldn’t be doing when I could be writing songs or reading a good book, or walking into town, or a doing a thousand other things that would constitute actual life experience.

And writing is the thing that gets neglected the most. Because writing is hard. And avoiding writing is normal. Avoiding writing is part of writing, in fact. But it’s the worst part. It’s the part that makes you feel like a loser, an imposter,  a bum.

Actually, I am writing today. Well, if writing is playing a chord progression over and over again on this guitar. I’ve been playing piano more than guitar lately. But the past week or so, I’ve played my little Martin while I watch TV, while I drink my tea in the morning, while I read what everyone else is doing on Facebook.

I think these chords are stolen from somewhere. In fact, I know exactly where they’re stolen from. But eventually, when I tire of playing that other artist’s song (OK, it’s Elliot Smith), I’ll rearrange them, and make a new song out of them. And when I do that, I’ll forget how hard it is to get started sometimes. I’ll have that feeling that comes from getting to the place I go that makes me feel of purpose and life sublime.  And I won’t share what I’m doing now, then, because I’ll be too busy writing.

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3 Responses to What Are You Doing Now?

  1. meryl says:

    hey lori, that certainly sums it all up for me these days. just substitute practicing architecture for writing. thanks for helping me with my facebook generated freak out yesterday.
    m

  2. faren kaye says:

    i know that writing avoidance feeling very well…and have also been using facebook to dance away from my poetry/prose dabbling. i say to myself that writing is writing and facebook is another form of self-expression…but it is “safe”…a place away from that lonely, introspective place that is the foundation for good writing…

  3. loondoo says:

    sigh…guess the old saying about the balance between Inspiration and Hard Work is generally true; it’s 30% Inspiration, and 70% Hard Work!!

    Sometimes a song flows out as one perfectly formed whole, but most of the time, it seems to be mostly Hard Work after the initial Inspirational Spark…

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